Poolman: reviews

What the critics say average 3.2 from 44 outlets

• 7.0 Everything's InterestingEric Langberg Pine’s directorial debut is practically begging you to call it a love letter to the City of Angels, and it is… but it’s a bit more nuanced than that, too Read
• 6.3 Roger EbertMatt Zoller Seitz I hope Pine makes more movies and refines whatever he was trying to do in this one. There are moments where it wanders into the sublime Read
• 6.3 The BulwarkSonny Bunch I’m a little surprised by the overwhelmingly negative response to Poolman; it doesn’t entirely work and the success or failure of a hangout movie will always depend on how much you enjoy hanging out with the folks on screen, but it’s a pleasant, occasionally silly 100 minutes, and a fine actors showcase Read
• 6.0 Los Angeles TimesKatie Walsh Pine’s “Poolman” is sort of the physical, emotional and spiritual embodiment of Los Angeles itself: earnest, silly and a little (or a lot) ridiculous, but insistently charming if you decide to surrender to the experience Read
• 6.0 New York TimesNicolas Rapold Pine wisely avoids winks to the audience. But he whiffs at making the mystery especially gripping, leaving one instead to savor the moments, like a note-perfect Bening calmly talking Pine’s befuddled pool man through his latest setback Read
• 6.0 FilmHoundsKatie Hogan Poolman hits the story beats found in any crime mystery with a few added random surprises. There are genuinely funny moments Read
• 6.0 Film AuthorityEddie Harrison Pine the writer deals Pine the director a crook hand; Poolman is crammed full of cringe-worthy self-awareness Read
• 5.8 Above the LineAbe Friedtanzer There is a great deal of intrigue but just as much baffling confusion, revealing a film with tremendous potential that makes selective use of its assets for a hypnotic but ultimately chaotic viewing experience Read
• 5.0 SlashfilmRafael Motamayor The mystery is a convoluted mess, clearly attempting to marry the intrigue of "Chinatown" with the escalating chaos of a Coen Brothers movie while failing to make things compelling, all while the wacky humor falls flat Read
• 5.0 Combustible CelluloidJeffrey M. Anderson But mostly the movie consists of actors shouting over each other, everyone making a great deal of noise and no one listening Read
• 5.0 ScreenAnarchyShelagh Rowan-Legg And while it suffers from a weak script, it's hard not to take enjoyment from the actors who seem to be having a wacky ride Read
• 4.5 The WrapMartin Tsai The film never fully commits itself to neo-noir beyond the plot Read
• 4.2 Dennis Schwartz Movie ReviewsDennis Schwartz There was nothing funny in this misguided comedy, that’s billed as a “love letter to L.A.” Read
• 4.0 The Daily BeastNick Schager Conspiracies are everywhere in Poolman, although the greatest mystery might be how anyone involved was attracted to this tidal wave of dire kookiness Read
• 4.0 The UpcomingAndrew Murray Unfortunately, though, Poolman struggles to recapture what made its influences work, delivering a finished product that feels underbaked Read
• 4.0 Common Sense MediaJeffrey M. Anderson This comedy (which is Pine's directorial debut) tries to be a love letter to L.A., and in that regard, it manages a few sweet, weird moments, but mostly it's noisy, jumpy, and ill-paced Read
• 4.0 Spectrum CultureJosh Goller Committed performances by a game cast can’t keep Poolman afloat when dragged down by a ponderous script that seems to confuse volume for depth Read
• 4.0 Flickering MythRobert Kojder There is potential in the silly idea of an LA-loving poolman stumbling into a detective case, but the wrong aspects of that wackiness are heightened, making this mostly insufferable but also an intriguing disaster Read
• 3.0 The Hollywood ReporterMichael Rechtshaffen While Pine is undeniably a charismatic actor, that likability can only generate so much audience good will in a production overstuffed with cartoonish caricatures lacking any sort of deeper connective tissue Read
• 3.0 Screen RantPatrice Witherspoon Poolman is an unfunny spoof of neo-noir thrillers with hazy direction, even messier storytelling, and unbearable dialogue Read
• 3.0 CinemalogueTodd Jorgenson Part broad noir-infused Hollywood satire and part broad caper comedy, Poolman remains stuck in the shallow end Read
• 3.0 MashableKristy Puchko In the end, Poolman plays an inside joke that never let its audience inside Read
• 3.0 JoBloChris Bumbray This desperately wants to be the next Big Lebowski or Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, but it would be better for all involved if Poolman comes and goes without much fuss Read
• 3.0 In Review OnlineConor Truax But ultimately, whether it’s the sun, chlorine, or weed, Pine seems entirely oblivious to just how shallow and superficially affected his first feature ends up being Read
• 2.5 ColliderTania Hussain But without the foundation of solid writing for Pine to direct from, everything ends up being lackluster and takes away from that aspect, no matter how strong the cast is and how cartoonish the situations are Read
• 2.5 The A.V. ClubEmma Keates If you’re a Chris Pine super-fan looking to live inside the actor’s head for a little while, Poolman just might be for you. But if you’re pretty much anyone else—even someone looking for some so-bad-it’s-good fun—take a lesson from the walkouts and stay out of the splash zone Read
• 2.5 ObserverEmily Zemler I’m sure Pine meant well. He probably had a good idea and couldn’t execute it. An incredibly stoned person wouldn’t be able to decipher Poolman —and neither can a general audience Read
• 2.0 Total FilmMatt Maytum You can at least say for the film that it’s clearly targeting a surreal, stoner vibe. But even cutting it that slack, there’s barely anything here to recommend Read
• 2.0 DeciderJohn Serba It never achieves any level of narrative momentum, and feels doomed from conception (...) Nothing about Poolman works. Not a damn thing Read
• 2.0 Film FeederJack Martin Poolman, on the other hand, does not have the luxury of being the funny type of bad; it’s just altogether bad, an astounding misfire that plenty of talented people got roped into and then given absolutely nothing to work with, for an entertainment-free 100 minutes Read
• 2.0 The GuardianSteve Rose You can see what he was going for: a knockabout stoner neo-noir paying homage to old-school Los Angeles, but this is more like Chinatown without the savagery, or Inherent Vice without the brains, or The Big Lebowski without the drugs Read
• 2.0 NYC Movie GuruAvi Offer At a running time of 1 hour and 40 minutes, it's a dull, meandering, painfully unfunny and unimaginative attempt at satire Read
• 2.0 Screen DailyFionnuala Halligan Poolman will mostly baffle viewers with a shallow plot that wants to salute Chinatown and the LA noir but ultimately confuses reams of dialogue with a screenplay Read
• 2.0 Little White LiesCharles Bramesco But like so much else in a film that squanders more resources than any first-time filmmaker not already a name brand would dare to dream of, the stoney-baloney atmosphere never rises to an enjoyable high, sitting as stagnant as chlorinated water Read
• 2.0 In The SeatsRod Thedorff There’s so much wrong with Poolman that it’s going to be hard to put it all down Read
• 2.0 DiscussingFilmRon Hilliard Many filmmakers don’t find their “stride” until their second or third feature, but it’s rare to see someone stumble out of the gate this badly Read
• 2.0 Film Focus OnlineJack Ransom Pine’s work behind the camera and the setting are solid, but the plot, characters, humour and pacing take a steep dive into a belly flop and miss the pool completely Read
• 2.0 Decine21Juan Luis Sánchez A pretentious, failed directing debut from the familiar actor Chris Pine (...) Perhaps Jim Jarmusch and his like could have struck gold with a strange story of this kind, but Pine lacks the talent for it Read
• 1.0 Culture MixCarla Hay “Poolman” is like a flimsy and faulty floating device that’s full of holes and quickly sinks due to its sheer incompetence. This comedy noir mystery is very unamusing and incoherent Read
• 1.0 FandomWireM.N. Miller Pine’s debut film is a dull, hollow, and shallow tribute to a genre with such a stunning lack of substance it becomes an excruciatingly insignificant and futile cinematic experience Read
• 0.0 IndiewireSiddhant Adlakha It’s only 100 minutes long, but upward of 99 of those minutes are likely to be spent in silent boredom, if not irritated disbelief at being subjected to such guileless, artless nonsense Read
• 0.0 VarietyOwen Gleiberman I take no vicious pleasure in saying that “Poolman,” a movie that Pine co-wrote, directed, and stars in, is not only the worst film I saw during the fall festival season but would likely be one of the worst films in any year it came out Read
• 0.0 ObserverRex Reed Not only is it the worst movie I have seen this year, this dog is one of the worst movies ever made Read
• 0.0 San Francisco ChronicleBob Strauss Like “Chinatown” with no stakes or “The Big Lebowski” minus the laughs, “Poolman” is a neo-noir comedy that shares just one quality with its superior influences: a palpable love for Los Angeles in all its corrupt, cruddy glory Read